At Mess
the cliche “your ownself is your greatest enemy” was never a failure. it is often, as much as always, in most situations, true. you know your own stengths, leading you to strike into your most weakest points. and this is what other people dont realize. (there could be some exemption, like your bestest bud). no matter how much you deny yourself and pretend to be somebody else in front of others, you can never lie to your own, how much you try to. at times, it may work out, but you dont have to wait for a lightyear to pass for reality to strike you out. and then later, ouch! and much later, you would prefer to bottle down the frustrations and depressions inside, no matter what way you want. well as for me, some animal in a jar is the best excuse to hurting and pain, but was never really an escape to never ending happiness.
i have always been myself’s worst enemy. and i was never a failure in portraying the role. in fact, im good at it. very good in hauling myself to some closed vault filled with snakes of all sorts, rodents, cockroaches, and red roses with a thousand thorns. as much as i have tried to sort things out and forget those that needed to be in the septic tank right now, i just couldnt. you see, i really know where to strike. the spot where i know il have my own self drop like a log, falt unto the ground. and when its done, i have a part crying and the other one laughing its heart out. i would prefer that one who’s laughing to be on top of everything. but sadly, as much as time would let, the laughing lasts for just a couple of minutes, and the crying part is coupled a hundred times.
i would really love to laugh. but right now, joker’s got his cards on me.
how i miss the old nyts, the barbecue sessions where we had to walk the downtown just to find some good food. how i miss the times when i used to stare at the sky and recognize the moon and the stars beneath the cloudy scene.the good laughs i shared with some good friends and the ncie songs we used to sing together.
somebody shut down my windows to the world. i dit it myself. i thought it would have to be good.but its not. its really not.
hey, i miss momments like this too, hehe binuntagay sa seawall, romanticizing with the beach(hehehe)baktas baktas nga hubog. baktas baktas sa juna, hehehe.
what people usually think as weakness is actually our strength, we cry not because were are weak, but because we are not afraid to tell other people that we are hurt (char char, murag koreks,) am i making any sense? hahha
I like your blog style, and your innovation views about the thing.